Beyond Bubble Baths: What Self-Care Means When You’re Chronically Ill
“The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes, but in having new eyes.”
– Marcel Proust
There’s something good in every day.
It doesn’t always feel that way and that’s ok. Some days the pain of living is just too much to notice anything else. Other times you’re just too tired to care. It’s hard to pick up the subtle signs of bliss when the noise of everyday life drowns out the quietness within you.
And yet, it’s there, waiting for you to pay attention.
It can be anything: a happy event, a simple pleasure or a shift in your outlook on life.
I used to walk down the streets, going from A to B, but my mind would be elsewhere. Things like christmas decorations or the daffodils in springtime would be gone soon after I first noticed them.
But now my daughter’s here, pointing out all that I’ve been missing (and yes, that means stopping ev-e-ry-where). This past spring, we watched the cherry trees blossom and countless ducklings swim in the pond near our house. Where I see a road that will lead us to wherever we’re headed, she will see barking dogs, benches to climb on and gnomes hidden in gardens.
It sounds incredibly corny, I know, but it’s hard to express how content and blessed these experiences have made me feel. I mean, how amazing is life when every moment becomes an opportunity to learn, play and discover?
And seeing the world with new eyes is contagious. It’s like looking at your surroundings through an Instagram lens – without actually getting so absorbed in taking the perfect picture that your mouth-watering meal is cold by the time you take your first bite.
You can find the beauty in every situation by bringing your attention to everyday sensations. Notice how good that vanilla cappuccino tastes after a night of tossing and turning. Close your eyes and really listen to your favourite song, the sound of the wind blowing through the trees or your lover’s heartbeat. Stop and smell the roses – literally.
Slow down, sharpen your senses and live in the moment.
Viewing the world through rose-coloured glasses doesn’t make your problems any less serious or real. Well-meaning words from people around you to “just think more positively” can be infuriating when all you want to do is scream, cry and be angry at the world for the pain you’re going through.
But happiness and sadness, misfortune and blessings can coexist at the same time. Trying to count your blessings doesn’t detract from your right to struggle with tough times. But it does make it more bearable. It’s the little positive things that help you get through the big bad ones. A hug when you need it the most. Feeling the sun on your face or digging into a bowl of comfort food on a hard day. A touching story to distract your mind from your problems for a while.
The reverse is also true. Sometimes surviving a personal tragedy can make you all the more appreciative and grateful for the simple pleasures in life, big and small.
Because every day may not be good, but there’s something good in every day. All you have to do is look for it.
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