The 5-4-3-2-1 Grounding Exercise for Anxiety with Chronic Illness
It’s one of the saddest feelings in the world: loneliness. Like Freddy Mercury sang:
“Sometimes I feel I’m gonna break down and cry. Nowhere to go, nothing to do with my time. I get lonely, so lonely, living on my own.”
Although being by yourself can make you feel lonely, loneliness isn’t the same as having no people around you. Sometimes it can be great to have time to yourself, while other times you may feel lost in a sea of people. That’s because are different kinds of loneliness:
- Social isolation, when you’re physically alone and don’t have any company. This kind of loneliness is common in the elderly, people who are housebound or when someone’s just moved to a new city where you don’t know anyone.
- Emotional loneliness is the feeling like no one understands you or what you’re going through. You feel different than everyone else due to your chronic illness, sexual orientation or world views. What’s more, it may feel like you have no one to talk to, because none of your friends and family truly listen or support you.
- A lack of belonging, the sense that you have no close relationships or aren’t part of any groups. Maybe you feel left out or even purposely excluded. Social media can also reinforce the idea that everyone is having a great time together – except you.
To make matters even worse, feeling lonely has a negative effect on your physical health too. Studies show that loneliness puts you at a higher risk of becoming ill and even a shorter lifespan.
Luckily, there are things you can do to feel more connected. There are no easy solutions, especially if you’re housebound with chronic illness. Depending on your situation and the kind of loneliness you’re experiencing, you could explore ways to strengthen existing relationships or make new friends. See if you can find people who do understand what it’s like to be sick every day, through patient support groups and online communities. Reach out to others, even if it’s hard.
Experiment with ways that you can join in on the fun in modified ways, by choosing low-energy activities, quiet venues and good times of day. But you could also learn to embrace the ‘me time’ you have by going on accessible solo dates or maybe even enjoying the solitude.
Also remember that loneliness isn’t all bad. Although the feeling definitely hurts, and you shouldn’t be lonely every day, occasional loneliness also has its upsides. Being alone gives you time to think, reflect and remind yourself what’s most important to you. It can stir your creative side; who hasn’t heard of a lonely, tormented artist who created their masterpiece during their darkest times?
Have a look at these 13 loneliness quotes below to make you feel less alone.
Hopefully these loneliness quotes remind you that you are never completely alone, even when it feels like nobody truly gets you.
What helps you when you feel lonely?
For more advice on how to deal with feeling alone, read ‘Emotional Loneliness: 5 Things to Do When Nobody Understand You‘ and ‘Sad & Sick? Your Mental Health Toolkit for Chronic Illness’.
You can also find tips at 7 Ways to Make New Friends When You’re Chronically Ill.
